Laura and I had a couple of good conversations today. She mentioned that I have basically been the father on this vacation that she had always hoped I would be. Honestly I have been the father that I had always wished to be – despite my struggles. We also got to talk about how much her siblings don’t comprehend about the quantum differences between the trials and crucible that we have been enduring and what any of them have experienced. They don’t understand is because they think it challenges have either been of our own making or else they see them as fundamentally the same as what they have experienced.
The reality is that when we say we have financial constraints we mean that taking a vacation would mean that we couldn’t buy food or utilities whereas when they say they have financial constraints they mean that they have to choose between vacations or limit how many new toys they choose to buy. They talk about financial limitations while spending sums of money we could only dream about on things that are clearly not essential (cruises, toys, computers). None of them are rich but all of them have some disposable income.
Laura also later caught a reminder if the kind of person she used to be – the person who has been buried beneath our intense struggles over so many years – and felt hope and desire to be that person again. She talks me that she finally wants to again be the person I first married both for her sake and for mine. That is an extremely positive development.
Also, my new shirt (“Warning: don’t touch my tools or my daughter”) drew a lot of comments and compliments.
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