A day that started with a terrible idea ended with one that was outlandish enough that it might work. This morning before I left for work Laura again suggested that we should divide the family into two households. I’m not certain if she intended for divorce or simply a separation. She imagined that two smaller households will be less chaotic and that she can handle the little boys while I take the other five. I pointed out that we already couldn’t afford to fully pay for one household and that two would be more expensive.
She obviously thought about that throughout the day because when she picked me up after work she had a new idea. She decided that the family needed me home from work for an extended period of time. I’ve never told her of the times I have thought that would be the key to getting us on our feet emotionally (it was obviously not financially reasonable). She also stated that she has realized that she is less functional that she had come to believe. That realization on her part is a real breakthrough. Up to this point she had never realized how far from functional her improvements have still left her. That’s not to dismiss the growth and stability that she had managed to obtain in the last couple of years but she had imagined that she had come to be holding her own compared to what would be expected when in reality she does perhaps as much as one quarter of what would be considered normal for a mother.
Laura is suggesting that we find some way to fund a period of having two stay at home parents. As fantastically beyond normal as that suggestion is, I agree with her that this is a direction that would actually address the issues we have in our family. The only suggestion so far for funding such an undertaking is to borrow against an inheritance. I’m not sure if that’s truly an option but it’s worth exploring. I’m going to see if I could invoke FMLA to ensure that we still have insurance for at least a few months. Honestly if we did this I don’t think I would ever come back to WTW. Part of getting us on our feet – and specifically getting me back on my feet – would almost certainly include me figuring out what I need in a job and finding a situation that met those needs.
Who knows what becomes of this but finding a way to bring me home and heal our family is a much better solution that splitting the family.
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