Somehow I never paid close attention to this detailed description of what baring afflictions with patience looks like. We are to forgive freely three trespasses with increasing blessings promised if we do so. After that we are allowed to use our judgement in how we respond to continued offenses. On the other hand, if we do not near with patience then the offence against us is considered justified (in other words the whole situation is called even if we do not bare with patience the offenses).
Likewise if enemies declare war on us we are to sue for peace three times and if we are rejected we are fully justified in defending ourselves.
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