I came home from work early feeling ill today. I’m sure it was the result of fatigue and stress after having an EXTREMELY intense conversation with Laura early into the morning and only going to sleep at 3AM. I took my test and finished Influencer. In the process of finishing I formulated some new family rules that should help us establish more togetherness and structure.
- Dinner every day (attached to a paired-chore-sprint) – this will be an important ritual to build and Martin an shared identity.
- Propinquity (physical proximity) – consistent casual interaction with make for better working relationships.
- Pair-choring (pairings change and who supervises the chore changes – not just older training younger) – my own term, based on the concept of pair programming. Each person gets to receive immediate feedback an learn to listen to each other appropriately.
- Report impediments – this will increase candor and help us mitigate the impediments where possible.
- Praise every small success – consistent positive reinforcement
- Work in 30-minute sprints for regular housework(if they don’t finish in 30 then they can expect another sprint later), not more than 2 in a day – this will help the kids focus in the work and learn that it isn’t forever.
- Impromptu family discussions do not exceed 15 minutes (impromptu being the key, planned or regular discussions like family counsel may be longer) – this will make it easier for the kids to focus when we need them to.
In addition to those family rules I figured out how to restructure the potty rewards for Isaac so that they don’t continue to be counterproductive (he won’t get in the potty without the phone).
No phone on potty. Minutes of phone time will be earned for using the potty after meals (going, flushing, washing hands, turning off lights each earn time)
Finally, after the conversation last day night with Laura: no bringing up things more than 30-days old unless it is severe AND has not been previously discussed.
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