For probably the first time in 20 years I was truly surprised this Father’s Day. Laura and the girls (probably Savannah and Mariah) got me balloons with confetti in them and an ice cream cake for Father’s Day. I didn’t have any hint that they had anything when they came out not long after church and presented them to me.
I wish there had been a camera when I flicked one balloon upward and it popped when it bumped the ceiling directly above me. I was shocked but then I marveled at the shower of confetti that fluttered down on me from the popped balloon—it looked like a scene choreographed in a movie.
It was a relaxed and pleasant Father’s Day.
Notes from church
Forgiveness: it occurs to me that we can never say to those who are offended by us that “you are required to forgive me.” We can only do as much as we can to apologize and make right but if they still do not forgive us we must just go on and choose not to be offended that they hold a grudge. Note that it is critical to apologize and make amends inasmuch as it is possible. We need to acknowledge our fault and ask for forgiveness. This is probably especially true for leaders.
“I have no room in my life to carry the burdens of others.” (By “carrying the burdens of others” she meant “holding a grudge against others.”)
Christy Hoopes
Sister Lois Falck said, “The reason that it’s so easy for those of us who are older to forgive is that we have practiced.” (I leaned over to Savannah and said, “older people who practiced holding grudges will find it easier to hold grudges as they get older.”)
Feeling hurt is not the same as holding a grudge or refusing to forgive. It may take time to get past the hurt and feel safe with those who have hurt or offended us but the question of forgiveness had more to do with our willingness to believe that they can or will repent even if we still feel the hurt. If we think of them as static and refuse to believe that they can change that is when we are refusing to forgive. Forgiveness doesn’t mean they have changed, it means we believe they can change or that we believe they don’t need to (if we come to see the offense as a simple mistake rather than the result of a flawed character).
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